DAY 43 - It's Okay to Be Concerned, But Don’t Be Consumed
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Alright, let’s be real for a minute. Life? Life is messy. It’s unpredictable. It’s this wild, chaotic ride that we’re all just trying to hang on to without losing our minds. And no matter how much we try to keep things together, sometimes life has other plans. You can plan all you want, you can make lists, set goals, and have everything lined up perfectly, but guess what? Life’s going to come in like a tornado and scatter everything.
Let me ask you: How many times have you felt like you’ve got everything under control, only for something to come out of nowhere and knock the wind out of you? One minute you’re coasting, everything’s smooth, and then bam—a problem hits, and suddenly, you’re spiraling.
We all know that feeling. It starts small—just a little worry at first. Maybe it’s something at work, like a deadline creeping up that you’re not sure you’ll meet. Or maybe it’s a fight with someone you care about, and you’re replaying that conversation in your head, thinking about all the things you wish you’d said differently. Or maybe it’s that one health issue you can’t stop Googling symptoms for. Whatever it is, it plants itself in your mind, and it doesn’t let go.
And before you know it, that small concern has turned into a full-blown obsession. It’s no longer just a passing thought—it’s consuming you. It’s all you can think about. You’re at work, but your mind is on that worry. You’re with friends or family, but you’re not really there because that worry has taken up all the space in your head. You’re lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, and that worry is sitting there, heavy on your chest, making it hard to breathe.
Can we just admit something? Worry is exhausting. It’s draining. It takes everything out of you and leaves you feeling empty, like you’ve run a marathon with no finish line in sight. And here’s the kicker—most of the time, that worry is about something you can’t even control. It’s about something that might happen, something that could go wrong, but hasn’t yet. We’re out here stressing ourselves sick over things that might never even come to pass.
Let’s get down to it: Why do we do this to ourselves? Why do we let these worries consume us? It’s like we think that by worrying, we’re somehow preparing ourselves for the worst. Like if we just think about it enough, we’ll be ready when the bad stuff happens. But let’s be honest—when has worrying ever actually helped? How many times have you gone through the mental gymnastics of worrying, only for things to turn out fine in the end?
Think about this: How many hours, days, or even weeks have you lost to worry? Time that you could have spent enjoying your life, but instead, you were stuck in this cycle of anxiety and stress. And what did you get out of it? Did all that worry solve the problem? Did it make you feel better? Or did it just leave you feeling more stressed, more tired, and more defeated?
Here’s the ugly truth: Worrying doesn’t change anything. It doesn’t fix the problem. All it does is steal your time, your energy, and your peace. And yet, we keep doing it, over and over again, like somehow this time will be different. But it’s not, and it never will be.
So what do we do? How do we stop ourselves from being consumed by worry? I’m not going to sit here and tell you to just “stop worrying,” because if it were that easy, we’d all be zen masters by now. But what I will tell you is that there’s a difference between being concerned and being consumed. Concern is natural. It’s healthy. It’s what keeps us aware and responsible. But when that concern tips over into obsession, that’s when we’ve got a problem.
Let me ask you: What’s the last thing that consumed you? Think about it. What was that one thing that took over your thoughts, your emotions, your life? How did it make you feel? And looking back on it now, was it worth all that energy? Did it deserve to take up so much space in your mind?
Now here’s the messy part: Life doesn’t come with a manual. There’s no guidebook that tells us how to handle the chaos, the uncertainty, the endless list of things that can go wrong. So we do our best. We try to control what we can, and we worry about the rest. But the truth is, there’s so much that’s out of our hands. And when we try to control the uncontrollable, that’s when we get into trouble.
Here’s where it gets real: We need to learn to let go. Not of our responsibilities, not of our concerns, but of the need to control everything. We need to accept that some things are just going to be messy, and that’s okay. It’s okay to not have all the answers. It’s okay to not know what’s going to happen next. It’s okay to be concerned about something without letting it consume you.
Think about it: What would happen if you loosened your grip just a little? What if, instead of trying to control every outcome, you allowed yourself to focus on what you can control and let go of the rest? What if you gave yourself permission to feel concern without letting it take over?
Here’s an exercise for you: The next time you feel yourself getting consumed by worry, take a step back and ask yourself three things:
- What can I do about this right now? If there’s something you can do, take action. If not, acknowledge that it’s out of your hands for now.
- Will this matter in a week, a month, or a year? Sometimes we let things consume us that, in the grand scheme of life, aren’t as important as we make them out to be.
- What is this worry costing me? Is it costing you your peace, your happiness, your sleep? And if so, is it worth it?
Let’s break it down: Life is going to be chaotic. There will always be something to worry about. But here’s the thing—we don’t have to let that worry consume us. We don’t have to let it take over our lives. We can choose to acknowledge our concerns, deal with what we can, and let go of the rest.
So here’s my challenge to you: The next time you feel that worry creeping in, threatening to consume you, take a deep breath and ask yourself, “Is this worth my peace?” If the answer is no, then it’s time to let it go. Not because you don’t care, but because you care enough about yourself not to let it take over.
And here’s one more thing: What would your life look like if you stopped letting worry be the driver? If you took back control, not by trying to fix everything, but by deciding what deserves your attention and what doesn’t? What if, instead of letting the chaos consume you, you learned to find peace in the middle of it?
Because here’s the messy, beautiful truth: Life is always going to be unpredictable. It’s always going to throw curveballs at us. But we get to choose how we respond. We get to choose whether we let those worries consume us, or whether we take a step back, breathe, and focus on what really matters.
So let me ask you: What’s one worry that’s been consuming you lately? And what’s one small step you can take today to shift from being consumed to being concerned? Because at the end of the day, it’s not about avoiding the mess—it’s about learning how to live in it without letting it take over.