Do You Have the Disease to Please?

The term "disease to please" is often used to describe a pattern of behavior where individuals go to great lengths to seek approval and avoid disapproval from others. This tendency can lead to chronic people-pleasing, often at the expense of one's own needs, desires, and well-being.

Listen To Oprah Winfrey: Do You Have the DISEASE TO PLEASE?

https://youtu.be/fde6rbPJbxA?si=jJiOkasei1k0mAfr

Here are some characteristics and considerations related to the "disease to please":

1. Excessive Need for Approval: Individuals with the "disease to please" often have an excessive need for external validation. They may prioritize others' opinions and expectations over their own.
2. Fear of Disapproval: There is often a deep-seated fear of disapproval or rejection. This fear can drive people to engage in behaviors that they believe will make them more likable or accepted.
3. Difficulty Saying No: People with this tendency may find it challenging to say no to requests or demands, even when it inconveniences them or goes against their own interests.
4. Low Self-Worth: The behavior can be linked to low self-esteem or a lack of self-confidence. Seeking constant approval may be a way to fill a perceived void in self-worth.
5. Burnout and Stress: Constantly striving to please others can lead to burnout and chronic stress. Neglecting one's own needs for the sake of pleasing others can take a toll on mental and physical health.
6. Loss of Authenticity: There may be a tendency to conform to others' expectations, leading to a loss of authenticity. Individuals may suppress their true feelings or opinions to avoid conflict or disapproval.
7. Impact on Relationships: While the intention may be to maintain harmonious relationships, the constant need to please can lead to unbalanced and unhealthy dynamics. It may also attract individuals who take advantage of the people-pleaser's accommodating nature.
8. Difficulty Setting Boundaries: Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries can be challenging for those with the "disease to please." They may fear that setting boundaries will result in rejection.

Addressing the "disease to please" often involves self-reflection, building self-esteem, and learning to prioritize one's own needs. Therapy or life coaching can be beneficial for individuals seeking to break this pattern of behavior and cultivate healthier relationships with themselves and others.

Here's a simple list to help put an end to the desire to people please:

1. Self-Reflection: Take time to reflect on your own needs, values, and priorities.
2. Set Clear Boundaries:  Define and communicate clear boundaries in your relationships.
3. Practice Saying No:  Start practicing saying no to requests that go against your values or overwhelm you.
4. Prioritize Self-Care:  Make self-care a priority to nurture your physical and emotional well-being.
5. Build Self-Esteem:  Focus on building your self-esteem by acknowledging your strengths and achievements.
6. Challenge Negative Thoughts:  Challenge negative thoughts that drive the desire to people please.
7. Understand Imperfection:  Understand that it's impossible to please everyone all the time.
8. Seek Support:  Talk to friends, family, or a professional about your desire to people please.
9. Celebrate Authenticity:  Celebrate and embrace your authentic self, and recognize the value of being true to who you are.
10. Embrace Assertiveness:  Embrace assertiveness as a positive quality in expressing your needs and opinions respectfully.
11. Accept No as a Complete Sentence:  Realize that saying no is a complete sentence and doesn't always require explanation.
12. Celebrate Progress:  Celebrate your progress in breaking the habit of people-pleasing.
13. Learn from Mistakes:  Understand that mistakes are part of the learning process. Learn from them and move forward.
14. Focus on What You Can Control:  Focus on what you can control rather than trying to control others' perceptions.
15. Be Kind to Yourself:  Be kind and patient with yourself throughout this process of change.

Remember, the journey to overcoming people-pleasing is unique to each individual. Small steps and consistent effort can lead to significant positive changes over time.

Here are some affirmations related to setting boundaries:

1. I honor and respect my own needs by setting clear and healthy boundaries.
2. My boundaries are a reflection of my self-worth, and I deserve to prioritize my well-being.
3. I communicate my boundaries with confidence and assertiveness, knowing that it's a positive and empowering act.
4. Setting boundaries is an act of self-love, and I am worthy of creating a life that aligns with my values.
5. I release any guilt or fear associated with setting boundaries. It is my right to prioritize my mental, emotional, and physical health.
6. Each boundary I set is a step toward a more balanced and fulfilling life.
7. I am in control of my time and energy. Setting boundaries allows me to use them wisely.
8. I attract relationships that understand and respect the boundaries I set.
9. I trust myself to make decisions that prioritize my well-being.
10. My boundaries are flexible and adapt to my evolving needs.
11. I release the need to please everyone. Setting boundaries is an act of self-care, not selfishness.
12. I am strong and empowered when I assert my boundaries.
13. I am deserving of a life that reflects my values and priorities. Setting boundaries allows me to create that life.
14. My boundaries are a shield against negativity and unnecessary stress.
15. I am in charge of my own happiness, and setting boundaries is a positive step toward maintaining it.

Repeat these affirmations regularly to reinforce a positive mindset and empower yourself in the process of setting and maintaining healthy boundaries.