Softness Doesn’t Equal Weakness

This is a topic that we often overlook: softness. In a world that praises strength, hustle, and control, softness is often misunderstood as weakness. But I’m here to remind you that choosing a softer approach—choosing peace over chaos—takes incredible strength. It’s about deciding what’s really worth your energy, and learning to let go when life gets out of hand.

Let me share something personal with you. I used to be that person who wanted to control everything. And I mean everything. If things weren’t going according to plan, I would get anxious, frustrated, and try to force everything back into place. Whether it was my career, personal life, or even little things like how clean the house was, I felt this deep need to be in control.

I remember this one day—it was a busy week, and everything felt like it was falling apart. I had back-to-back meetings, my inbox was flooded, and I was trying to juggle work, family, and personal time. In the middle of all of this, my son Kyre had a school project due, and I hadn’t even had the time to sit down and help him. I remember frantically rushing to get it all done—fixing everything, cleaning, working, trying to be the “perfect” mom, the “perfect” business owner, the “perfect” everything.

But guess what? The harder I pushed, the worse it got. I was trying so hard to control every aspect of my life that I wasn’t present in any of it. I wasn’t fully there for Kyre. I wasn’t fully there for myself. It felt like I was drowning. And that’s when it hit me—why am I doing this to myself? Why am I gripping so tightly to things that don’t even need to be perfect?

That day, I let go. I made the conscious decision to stop trying to force everything into perfection. I called it a day. I sat with Kyre, and we worked on his project together. No rushing, no stress, just enjoying the moment. And you know what? It was enough. More than enough. Letting go of that control gave me the space to breathe and to be present.

The Relatable Mess:

I think we’ve all been there, haven’t we? That constant battle between wanting to be in control and knowing deep down that life has its own plans. When things spiral out of control, our first instinct is to grip tighter. We want to micromanage, plan, and force things to go the way we envisioned. But here’s the truth: the more we try to control, the more chaos we invite into our lives. It’s like holding sand—the tighter you squeeze, the faster it slips through your fingers.

I’ve learned that the key is in letting go—not letting go of your dreams, your goals, or your ambitions—but letting go of the need to force them into being. There’s power in surrendering to the flow of life and understanding that we don’t have to fight every battle, fix every problem, or control every outcome.

Softness as Strength:

Softness, to me, is like water. Water is soft, right? It moves with the flow, it bends around obstacles, and it finds its way no matter what. But here’s the thing—water is also one of the most powerful forces in nature. It’s resilient. Over time, it can carve through rock and reshape landscapes. Softness is the same. It’s not about being passive or letting life walk all over you. It’s about being adaptable, resilient, and strong in ways that don’t require you to constantly be “on.”

When we choose softness, we’re choosing to protect our peace. We’re deciding that not every battle is worth our energy and that some things are better left to unfold naturally. We’re saying, “I’m strong enough to let this go, and trust that what’s meant for me will come.”

The Struggle of Letting Go:

I know how hard it can be to let go. Trust me, I’ve been there. I’ve been the one to fight for control over everything—believing that if I could just stay on top of everything, life would be perfect. But the truth is, life isn’t meant to be controlled. It’s meant to be lived.

Letting go of control doesn’t mean you’re giving up. It doesn’t mean you’re weak. It means you’re smart enough to recognize what’s draining your energy and what’s lifting you up. It means choosing peace over perfection, choosing softness over chaos, and trusting that what’s for you will never miss you.

Softness is a Power Move:

One of the hardest lessons I’ve learned in life is that not everything needs my reaction. Not every situation requires me to jump in and fix it. Sometimes, the strongest thing you can do is step back, breathe, and let things unfold.

Softness isn’t about being weak; it’s about being wise. It’s about knowing when to push and when to pull back. It’s about choosing peace, even when everything around you is screaming for chaos. And let me tell you, that’s a power move.

Letting Go of the Chaos:

We all have chaos in our lives. Whether it’s work stress, family obligations, or just the noise of everyday life, it’s easy to get swept up in it. But the real challenge—and the real strength—comes in choosing not to participate in that chaos. It’s in saying, “I’m not going to let this steal my peace.”

You have a choice, every day, to either engage with the chaos or protect your softness. You can either let life’s stresses take over, or you can step back and decide what really matters. When you choose softness, you’re choosing you. You’re choosing your peace, your joy, and your well-being.

So today, I want to encourage you to lean into that softness. Embrace it as the powerful force it truly is. Don’t let anyone, or any situation, make you feel like you need to be hard or constantly in control. There’s strength in letting go, and there’s power in knowing that softness doesn’t mean weakness—it means you’re strong enough to let life flow, without losing yourself in the process.

Be like water, my friends. Soft, yet unstoppable.