DAY 41 - Real is More Attractive Than Perfect

You ever look around and feel like you’re the only one barely keeping it together? Like you’re the only person who’s winging it while everyone else is out there living these perfect, curated lives? How often do you feel like you’re constantly falling behind or like you’re just not good enough?

Let me tell you something that took me way too long to learn—nobody has it all together. Even the people who seem flawless, the ones who seem to glide through life without a care—they have their own mess too. They just hide it better. The truth is, we’re all a little messy. We all have our struggles, our scars, and our moments when nothing goes as planned.

But here’s what I’ve learned: being real, embracing that mess, is so much more attractive than chasing perfection.

We’re all so busy running after some idea of ‘perfect,’ but what does perfect even mean? Who decides what’s perfect? And why do we let it control us? Perfect tells you that you’re never good enough. It tells you that you have to hide your flaws, smooth out your edges, and cover up the parts of yourself that are messy and complicated.

But I’m here to tell you—perfect is a lie. It’s exhausting. And chasing it will leave you drained, unfulfilled, and disconnected from who you really are. When was the last time you felt like you could just be yourself without feeling the need to perform or live up to someone else’s expectations?

Instead of constantly trying to fit into some impossible standard, why not embrace being real? Why not embrace the parts of you that are a little rough around the edges, the parts of you that are still growing and evolving?

Let me share five tips that will help you step into that realness, embrace your authenticity, and let go of the need to be perfect.

1. Embrace Your Imperfections

The first step? Embrace what makes you different. When was the last time you looked in the mirror and accepted all the parts of yourself—the good, the bad, and the ugly? We’ve all got quirks, flaws, and mistakes in our story. That’s what makes us human. That’s what makes us real.

But society tells us to hide those parts, to only show the polished version of ourselves. How many times have you felt like you had to apologize for not being “perfect”? It’s time to stop apologizing. Your imperfections don’t make you less worthy—they make you more relatable. They’re what connect you to others.

Think about it: Have you ever bonded with someone over their perfect life? Probably not. But I bet you’ve connected with someone who shared their real struggles, their real journey. When you start embracing your imperfections, you become a magnet for deeper connections, more meaningful relationships, and a greater sense of self-worth.

Action Tip: Start with something small. The next time you catch yourself criticizing your imperfections, shift your mindset. Ask yourself, “How can I embrace this part of me instead of hiding it?” Start showing up as your whole self, imperfections and all, and watch how others respond to your authenticity.

2. Set Boundaries to Protect Your Peace

One of the sneakiest traps of perfectionism is people-pleasing. How many times have you said yes to something you didn’t want to do just because you were afraid of letting someone down? The fear of not being enough, of not living up to other people’s expectations, keeps us stuck in the cycle of overcommitting and burning ourselves out.

But here’s the truth: Real is knowing your limits. Real is protecting your peace. And that means setting boundaries. How often do you feel like you’re constantly doing things for others and leaving nothing for yourself? It’s time to flip that script.

When you set boundaries, you’re not just saying no to things that drain you—you’re saying yes to yourself. You’re saying yes to your mental health, your happiness, and your well-being. And that’s powerful. What would your life look like if you started protecting your peace unapologetically?

Action Tip: Start by identifying one area of your life where you need stronger boundaries. Maybe it’s with your time, your energy, or your relationships. Take one small step this week to honor that boundary—say no when you need to, and don’t apologize for it.

3. Celebrate Your Small Wins

In the chase for perfection, we often forget to celebrate ourselves. How often do you downplay your achievements because they don’t seem "big enough"? We’re always waiting for the next big thing—the promotion, the dream house, the perfect relationship. But real life is made up of small, everyday wins.

Real is showing up, even when you don’t feel like it. Real is pushing through a hard day and still making it to the end. Real is taking that first step toward a new goal, even if it’s small. When was the last time you took a moment to celebrate yourself for the little things?

Celebrating your small wins is about recognizing that progress is still progress, no matter how small it may seem. Perfect will tell you it’s not enough, but real will remind you that every step matters.

Action Tip: Make it a habit to celebrate one small win every day. Maybe it’s getting out of bed when you didn’t feel like it. Maybe it’s finishing that task you’ve been putting off. Whatever it is, take a moment to acknowledge it and celebrate the fact that you showed up.

4. Allow Yourself to Be Vulnerable

We live in a world where vulnerability is often seen as a weakness. But let me ask you this: When was the last time you felt truly connected to someone because they were vulnerable with you? When they shared their real story, their real feelings, their struggles?

Vulnerability is the ultimate strength. It’s what allows us to drop the masks, stop pretending, and show up as our authentic selves. But so many of us are terrified of it. We’re scared of being judged, rejected, or seen as weak. How many times have you hidden your true feelings out of fear?

But here’s the truth—being real requires vulnerability. It requires letting down your guard and trusting that you’re enough just as you are. What would happen if you allowed yourself to be vulnerable more often? If you stopped pretending that everything is fine and started being honest about where you’re really at?

Action Tip: The next time someone asks you how you’re doing, be honest. Don’t say, “I’m fine,” if you’re not. Share your real feelings, even if it feels uncomfortable. Vulnerability builds connection, and connection is what we’re all really craving.

5. Stop Comparing Your Journey to Others

Comparison is the thief of joy, but it’s also the fuel for perfectionism. How many of you have scrolled through social media and immediately felt like your life didn’t measure up? Like you weren’t doing enough, achieving enough, or being enough because someone else seemed to be doing better?

But here’s the thing—you’re comparing your behind-the-scenes to someone else’s highlight reel. How much time do you waste comparing your journey to someone else’s? Every single person has a different path, a different timeline, and a different purpose. Just because their story looks different from yours doesn’t mean you’re not on the right track.

Real is staying in your own lane. It’s focusing on your own growth, your own progress, and your own journey without getting distracted by what everyone else is doing. What if you stopped comparing and started celebrating your own path?

Action Tip: The next time you catch yourself comparing your life to someone else’s, pause. Remind yourself that you’re on your own journey, and it doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. Shift your focus back to your own progress and appreciate how far you’ve come.

At the end of the day, it’s not the polished, perfect version of yourself that people will remember. It’s the real, raw, and messy you. It’s the you that showed up, scars and all. The you that embraced the journey, let go of perfection, and chose to live authentically.  So, what are you waiting for? It’s time to stop chasing perfect and start showing up real. What’s one thing you’re ready to let go of today? One step toward being more real that you’re ready to take?  Because real is more attractive than perfect. Real is where the magic happens. And real is what makes you unforgettable.

Now, let’s go out there and be real together.